Although many of us long for that perfect relationship with no conflicts, the freedom to be ourselves fully while feeling committed and safe in the partnership - that is not often our reality.
The reality is that relationships are hard work and that many of us in fact struggle with the same themes around meeting our own needs while meeting the needs of our partner.
Relationships and partnership in particular is where we are confronted with ourselves, this is where all of our relational baggage shows it’s ugly face.
It can be quite overwhelming to have our partner project all of their unhealed relational trauma onto us, or to lose the connection to ourselves and our own needs while focusing on meeting theirs.
If we don’t know what is happening or have the tools to meet it together this usually ends up suffocating our love and ending the relationship.
But if we have the understanding of how relational trauma gets triggered in partnership and learn to meet it together with awareness, we can not only prevent & resolve conflicts easier but also keep deepening our connection.
Relationships don’t grow deeper & stronger from having no conflicts, they grow from the strength & resilience we build when we move through challenges together.
The thing is though: this is something we cannot do on our own while we are stuck in our patterns, otherwise we would’ve solved all of our problem already.
We need support from outside the relationship to give us new perspectives and show us what we cannot see on our own, our blind spots as well as our strengths.