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Boundary, set, go?

Skribentens bild: Ida HelmersIda Helmers

A common misconception when it comes to boundary work is that we are meant to find our boundaries once and then know for sure what they are.


So we make sure to consider all the pros and cons while deciding if we’re a yes or a no to something, putting a lot of pressure on ourselves to be sure to make the right choice.


We might even believe that changing our mind means we are failing at having no boundaries, so we keep ourselves from feeling into it again and only ever making one choice.


This creates boundaries that are lifeless and stagnant, often times they coming across as inflexible and hard to our loved ones.


This is part of the process of getting to know our boundaries and might be necessary to practice setting them, after maby suppressing them our whole life.


However, to not get stuck here and create to much frustration in our relationships, we might want to consider seeing boundaries as something alive and moving - like a dance.


What if we can give ourselves permission to feel into what is true and relevant for us moment to moment?


What if it’s not one choice but a continuous choosing?

What if we let ourselves move with the ever

changing aliveness from within that shows us what we need, desire and want?


Once our boundaries become a dance between no and yes, there is so much beauty and aliveness that can unfold on the vast spectrum in between.


This is where we can come alive.



I invite you to join me on sunday in Malmö for a whole day dedicated solely to getting to know and dancing with your boundaries, while creating a sense of safety from within your nervous system.





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